This morning after the service an older woman in our church made about 4 or 5 comments during our very brief conversation about how big my pregnant belly is getting . She said something about how I only have a couple more weeks before our baby is due. I said, "Well, about 5 weeks." She said something like, "Wow! Just imagine how huge (she might have said big, but huge is the word that stuck in my mind...LOL) you'll be in 4 or 5 more weeks!" Thanks a lot, dear sister! :)
You know, there were several other people who made comments to me today. A couple of people told me how good I look (being pregnant), three people complimented me on the purple top I was wearing (and that it's a good color on me), two people complimented my hair (and the scarf I had in it); yet the negative comments were the ones that stuck in my mind. Words really are a powerful force, aren't they?!
For our women's Sunday School class we have been studying the Wisdom of Proverbs (a study by Wendy Blight). Ironically, this week we studied Proverbs chapters 10 and 18 focusing on controlling our tongues, and that's what we discussed today. Note: the elderly lady I mentioned above doesn't normally attend Sunday school, but I'm thinking perhaps she would have benefitted from this weeks study. hee hee :)
During Sunday School we discussed how our words can either "build up" another or can "tear" them down (can give life or death). Now, I must say, I know that the dear sister mentioned above wasn't trying to hurt me with her words. We're all guilty at times of speaking words in haste, without thinking and without regard to the effects, still today her words and the positive words of others were a great picture in my mind of what was already revealed to me this week through God's Word. Our words are powerful! This was just a SMALL thing. It really was. However, it was also a GREAT BIG reminder to me that I'd rather be the one speaking positive, uplifting, life-giving words, than the one making the negative, not-so-helpful comment without even thinking.
This woman's words weren't poisonous or perverse or violent (and I'm honestly not trying to be hard on her!!). However, her words weren't exactly "life giving" either. Before we say what's on our mind it is good to ask ourselves, "Is this true? Is it kind? Is it helpful? Is it needed/necessary?"
Kind: Although they weren't necessarily said in a mean-hearted, unkind spirit, I'd say no...not so kind. :)
Helpful: Not so much. The last thing a pregnant woman wants to hear is how HUGE she is. lol
Needed/Necessary: Nope.
I've said it before and I'll say it again, a person shouldn't make a comment to a pregnant woman about her appearance unless telling her, "You look great!" or "You're glowing." Being preggers can be tough. Why not "build up" a sister?!?! Find something positive to say. It's not like we pregnant women can help how big our belly gets.
No worries, dear reader! Although I'm using this woman's words to make a point here, I'm really taking them lightly, choosing to laugh about her comments and to consider the source. My husband and I have had some great laughs about it already several times today.
I'm not going to spend the following weeks worrying about it. Instead I'm going to enjoy it. Maybe we will have more children down the road, maybe we won't. Regardless, this special time of THIS pregnancy will only last a little while longer. So, I'll enjoy feeling the baby move within my womb (guessing whether that's a knee or an elbow that I see moving across my belly), praying for the baby's health and thanking God that we are both growing! Soon I'll get to hold and snuggle my precious baby...AND my belly will shrink. :)
My big belly will go away, but I pray that this lesson on controlling my tongue remains with me forever! I want my words to be full of wisdom, to be encouraging, uplifting, positive, peaceful, gentle, loving, kind; so I'm going to try to ask myself BEFORE I speak, "Is this true? Is this kind? Is this helpful? Is this needed/necessary?" even in the seemingly small things. If the answer is no, I pray I'll remember to zip up my lips...and spare those around me. :) LORD, help me!!
Wise words satisfy like a good meal; the right words bring satisfaction. The tongue can bring death or life; those who love to talk will reap the consequences. Proverbs 18: 20-21