Rest

I have to admit my mind spins too much most of the time.  And like most people I get on the "crazy cycle" at times.  Life in this modern world can get busy, too busy sometimes. 

When 2014 dawned I found God leading me to simplify, to cut back on commitments and re-focus on the most important.  I reduced my number of commitments.  Yet, life kept spinning.  I slowed down for spinal surgery.  But, I recovered and jumped right back in.  I wasn't running as much.  Still, my heart felt unsettled, restless.  

I hear people complain about winter.  I've complained about it plenty of times myself.  However, the last few years I've seen the beauty in it.  No, not the snow necessarily (but if you have eyes to see, it is beautiful too) or the cold or the wind or the ice.  The beauty I see in it is: the call to rest. 

  “Return to your rest, my soul, for the Lord has been good to you.”

Psalm 116:7

We had an unseasonably warm December.  But now it's January.  It's well below zero today with much more wretched wind chills.  A fresh layer of snow fell last night.  Schools are closed (not that it matters much to us homeschoolers), roads conditions are hazardous and we don't have to go anywhere.  On days like this we hunker down.  Once our chores and school work are done (farmers and homeschoolers don't take snow days), we play games.  We eat soup and other comfort food.  We snuggle up on the couch together with a good book or movie.  I enjoy time with my family!

When I find a few moments to myself, I am still.  I find time to read, write, reflect and breath.  I might even taken a nap.  I give my mind a rest and just "be".  I find rest for my harried soul. 

I've had time to talk to God about what He wants for me (and my family) in 2015.  I hear Him whispering, "Don't forget how good it is to rest."  And I realize winter isn't all that bad.  In fact, it's the season of rest God knew I needed. 

I certainly am not an expert at this resting thing.  It has taken me time to rein in my spinning mind and restless heart.  Still, I'm glad the rest came when I saw winter as a chance to quiet my soul.

How about you?  Will you spend this winter feeling restless and complaining, or will you be intentional and find rest for your soul? 
      

Comfortable

The boys and I just finished reading an inspiring book about a great Christian hero named Lillian Trasher.  I will attempt to tell of her life's work in only a few paragraphs.

Lillian Trasher was a missionary to Egypt from 1911 to 1961.  But becoming a missionary was not part of Lillian's original plan.  No, she wanted to be an artist for the Georgian Newspaper.  In fact, she had quite a talent and nearly had the job of her dreams.  But, due to a miscommunication, the job was mistakenly given to someone else.  From there, God lead Lillian to work in an orphanage in North Carolina (that's quite a neat story in itself).

Lillian served in this orphanage for a few years.  There she met a handsome young pastor who she fell in love with and they became engaged.  All the plans were in place and she was so thrilled.  But one week (yes one week!!) before their scheduled wedding, Lillian felt a sudden prompting in her heart to go to Africa as a missionary.  Not only was Lillian engaged to be married to a man who did not feel a call to the mission field, she was absolutely broke and it wasn't exactly a normal thing for a single woman to travel to foreign lands in those years, especially to do mission work.  With no financial backing or a clue what she was getting into, in faith Lillian called off her engagement and (through some very interesting turn of events) sailed for Egypt.

Over the very hard years of her life, Lillian prayerfully and faithfully did the work called her to do.  She opened the very first Egyptian orphanage and took in nearly 10,000 orphans plus thousands of widows in her lifetime.  Many, many times she didn't even know where their next meal would come from, but she trusted God and He always came through for them.

Because of Lillian many children were saved both physically and spiritually.  And the trickle effect was phenomenal.  Many of her children went on to be successful people in the community, even opening churches and other orphanages throughout Egypt.

I'm sharing all of this with you, friends, because I have to tell you what God showed me as I read about Lillian Trasher.  And ask you a question that I asked myself...

Did God Call Us to Be Comfortable?

You know, it would have been really easy for Lillian to ignore God's call.  She could have stayed in America and married the young pastor.  She could have served the church as a pastor's wife her whole life, in security and comfort.  It sure would have saved her a lot of heartache.  It would have looked really good to everyone, because she would have been doing "God's work".  No one would have known the difference...except God, of course.

But Lillian didn't do that.  She didn't ask God to follow and bless her plans.  No, she trusted God and followed His lead even when it was very uncomfortable and certainly inconvenient.  She prayed continually asking for strength and sacrificed it all for God and others, an example of the love of Christ.  She recognized her humble dependence on God day after day after years of days.  And she impacted THOUSANDS of lives!  That is why she is a true Christian hero.

So, let me ask you again...

Did God Call US to Be Comfortable?

I asked myself many questions as I read about Lillian Trasher, "When was the last time I sacrificed to give? How often do I ask Jesus to follow me, rather than the other way around?  How often do I ask Him to bless my plans, especially those seemingly "good and noble" things I am doing "for Him"?  How often do I give in a way that is inconvenient and sacrificial?"

I'm not talking about irresponsible giving!  I'm speaking of a gift that costs me something...not just me giving a little of my abundance.  And I'm not just talking about money, there are many ways to give.  I'm talking about a humble pouring out of myself as a sacrifice, unselfishly.  To give of myself; my time, my resources, my gifts, my energy and yes, even my money, to glorify God and expand His kingdom.  Honestly, it's much easier to sit where I'm comfy cozy.  All the while asking God to use me.

Near the end of Lillian Trasher's life a news reporter asked her, "Miss Trasher, what is the secret of your missionary success?  What is the greatest thing you ever did?"  Lillian's reply, "There isn't any secret.  I just stayed!  I did not quit.  I stayed with the work God gave me to do."

Lord, purify my heart.  Show me how and where to serve - to follow Your call, rather than ask you to follow my plans (even if they seem good).  Show me how to live out the call to live in genuine love.  Enable me to give of my plenty (in numerous ways) through faith, so that You may be glorified.  Not just when it's comfortable and pretty, but all the time.  I'm thankful for all You have given.  Help  me to share of myself as You would.  And continue on even when it isn't easy.  In the name of Jesus, I pray.  Amen.

What about you?  What is God calling you to do?  Not all of us are called to be missionaries, but that doesn't mean He doesn't have work for you to do!  I do not believe that God blesses us so that we can hoard up treasures for ourselves and live unchallenged lives.  Just look at the lives the patriarchs of the Bible, even Jesus himself, they lives were challenging...and fruitful!  In the big things and seemingly small things God blesses faithfulness.

"It is possible to evade a multitude of sorrows through the cultivation of an insignificant life.  Indeed, if a person's ambition is to avoid the troubles of life, the recipe is simple: Shed your ambitions in every direction, cut the wings of every soaring purpose, and seek a life with the fewest contacts and relations.  If you want to get through life with the smallest trouble, you must reduce yourself to the smallest compass.  Tiny souls can dodge through life; bigger souls are blocked on every side.  As soon as a person begins to enlarge his or her life, resistances are multiplied.  Let a person remove petty selfish purposes and enthrone Christ, and suffering will be increased on every side."  Henry Jowett

P.S. Lillian used her God given drawing abilities later on when she designed her own building plans for her first official orphanage building.  God knows just what He is doing!  :)

"And if you do not carry your own cross and follow me, you cannot be my disciple. But don't begin until you count the cost...you cannot become my disciple without giving up everything." 

Luke 14:27-28, 33

It All Begins In the Mind!

This week I started a new online study of "Prayers for a Woman's Soul" by Julie K. Gillies.

I've had this wonderful prayer devotional book for a while and have read it.  But I chose to do this study for three reasons:

1. I love Julie K. Gillies (and knew she would lead me the right way!)
2. I knew it would be profitable (time in prayer and God's Word always is!)
3. I knew I needed to get refocused on my prayer time (it's been a busy summer!)

As we started out the week focused on the topic of Chapter 1: My Mind, I knew this study was just what I needed.  :) God has done what He always seems to do, reestablished the message over and over throughout the week...at every turn!

Examples:

Through time in His Word He revealed to me a bad attitude I had toward a family member that began in my mind.

Through our mentor mom at MOPS I was reminded to discern fact from feeling (what is true?!) in relation to controlling our emotions, again something that begins in my mind.

Through a Christian radio program I was reminded that what I tell myself (in my mind) will affect every other part of my life.

Julie says that the enemy's plan is to consistently assault our minds until we surrender. She wrote, "The number-one way to resist the enemy is through prayer. Though the attacks against our mind can be subtle, God grants discernment when we ask Him."

It's true!  As I've focused on My Mind in prayer this week, He has revealed to me the negative mindsets that hinder not only my walk with Him, but every other relationship in my life.  Insecurity (self-focus), pride, negativity, anger, a critical spirit.  It all goes back to my mind!

Maybe you struggle with fear, worry, envy, comparison, lust.  Whatever your struggle, it goes back to your mind.  These negative mindsets must be replaced with the Truth that we find in His Word (the Holy Bible).  

We truly do need to take every thought captive and be transformed by the renewing of our minds through Christ.  And Julie is right when she says there is no better place to start than through prayer. When we ask for discernment and help, He is faithful to answer!

If you're interested in joining Julie's study (or would just like to read the first chapter of her book for yourself) check out this link.

"And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove that the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect."  

Romans 12:2

"So letting your sinful nature control your mind leads to death. But letting the Spirit control your mind leads to life and peace." 

Romans 8:6

P.S. Julie K. Gillies did not ask me to write a post about her study, I just felt led to this morning.  :)

No Fear. No Good.

I don't expect this to be a popular post.  But I pray someone will read it anyway because I feel a compelling conviction to write about an unpopular subject that I believe needs to be addressed.  Fear.

Fear is popular when we speak of, "Fear Not".  But what about when someone encourages us to fear more, not less?

Remember the old Nike slogan "No Fear"?  It sometimes seems to me that many modern day "Christians" have taken on this slogan as their own.  We're constantly focused on God's love, grace and friendship.  We offer feel good messages that encourage and uplift to remind the hearer that God has a plan for our lives, that we have a purpose, God answers prayers and wants to help us.  We talk of the strength He gives and the joy He shares.  All of those things are true, but we leave out another truth.  We are also called to Fear!

Oh yes, we teach, "Do not fear".  It's in the Bible 365 times, you know.  This fear is a negative fear, fear of other things besides God.

But you know what the Bible also says often?  "Fear the LORD".  This is a good, healthy fear!  It's the fear that drives out all other fear and the fear that drives us to submission to the One and Only God.

In fact Isaiah 8:13 says, "Do not fear anything except the LORD Almighty. If you fear Him, you need not fear anything else."  So we must fear Him.  Then we won't have to fear anything else because He will be with us.

I'm not talking about a scared-to-death, fearful, on-the-edge waiting for God to strike-you-down kinda fear.  I'm talking about a reverence, a holy fear of an Almighty God who said, "If you love me, you will obey me."  I'm talking about the kind of fear that makes us repentant, that brings us to our knees in prayer, that draws us into a closer relationship with God and a holier lifestyle.  The kind of fear that prompts us to live as we know we should, rather than follow our own lustful, fleshly desires.  A fear that reminds us that one day each and every one of us will stand before God and answer for the life we lived.  Yes, our Good God is merciful and gracious, but He is also a good Judge, just and fair.  He will judge according to His Word, not man's standards.

Yes, it's true, if we know the LORD as our personal Savior we have found freedom from death and sin.  But this freedom doesn't give us a license to live as we please.  Quite the opposite...

"For you are free, yet you are God's slaves, so don't use your freedom as an excuse to do evil. Respect everyone, and love your Christian brother and sisters. Fear God..."  I Peter 2:16-17

"Turn away from evil and do good. Search for peace, and work to maintain it. The eyes of the LORD watch over those who do right, and his ears are open to their prayers. But the Lord turns his face against those who do evil." I Peter 3:11-12

Too much dwelling on God's grace and not enough time talking about a Righteous Fear of God has lead us to a lackadaisical, relaxed approach to a Holy, Awe-inspiring God.  This ought not be!

It seems that our culture thinks that anyone who says a prayer and believes in God is on their way to heaven.  But James 2:19 says, "You say you have faith, for you believe that there is one God. Good for you! Even the demons believe this and tremble in terror."  The demons believe and they even tremble with fear, but they're still not okay with God and they're definitely not going to heaven, friends!!

The fear of God, a holy reverence for Him, drives us to repentance (a turning away from sin) and righteous living.  Not everything is okay.  We will answer to a just God.  Not some old man, weary and worn, who overlooks our blatant sin.  We must live in a healthy fear of the One Who made us.

"When you follow the desires of your sinful nature, the results are very clear: sexual immorality, impurity, lustful pleasures, idolatry, sorcery, hostility, quarreling, jealousy, outbursts of anger, selfish ambition, dissension, division, envy, drunkenness, wild parties and other sins like these...anyone living like this will not inherit the kingdom of God.

BUT the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.  There is no law against these things!"

Galatians 5:19-23

Let's review:

No fear.  No good.

Fear God.  No other fear will be necessary.  But we must... 

Honor.  Tremble.  Revere a Holy God.

Look at His Word, what does it say?  We can't pick and choose from it.  All of it is Truth.

A Healthy Fear of God is good and profitable!

Be Still My Child: A Lesson About My Father That I Learned Through My Son

He sat there in my arms silently, legs wrapped around my waist.  His arms tucked in warmly under his chest against mine.  His head on my shoulder.  No talking.  No eye contact.  Just cuddling.  I would rub his back or cheek, then stop to hug him tighter. 

Eventually he put his arms around my neck and squeezed.  We couldn't get any closer. His blonde locks in my face, I breathed in his scent. I was  determined to remember every part of it...his smell, his touch, his heart beating against mine.

It doesn't seem that long ago that I held him as a tiny bundle.  Night time feedings and constant care guaranteed plenty of cuddle time.

 

But it was a rare moment for me and my, now, six year old.  Normally he doesn't have time for such things.  He's a busy little boy.  Very active and always thinking.  He has things to do and see and learn.  No time to be still.  In fact, from the time he began tummy time this child has rarely been still.  A fact that made this time with him even more special. 

We sat there on the couch for ten minutes maybe.  This momma's heart was taking it all in, cherishing every second.  I didn't ask any questions.  I just held him, knowing full well that moments like these will become even less frequent as time continues to press on.

When our cuddle time was over he got up with a sweet smile, kissed and hugged me.  Then, ran off to his next activity.  My heart felt so full.  I was so thankful for the time we had.  Yet, longing for more, more time with the one I love so dearly.  Wishing we could stop time and just be still (and aware) more often.  My heart rejoiced that it was me he wanted to cuddle.

My heart cried out, "Do this more!  Be still more!  Be still, my sweet, precious, little child!"

As I thought about this rare, yet priceless, encounter I began to wonder, "Is this how my Heavenly Father feels when I sit still in His presence?  When I, His beloved child, spends time with him, uninterrupted and undistracted.  Does His heart fill with joy?  Does He celebrate those rare moments when I am simply still and unbusied long enough to sit with Him?

All too often I'm following my own agenda, checking off lists and hurrying about my day.  Even my Bible reading and prayer time can be hurried.  How often do I sit with Him, quiet in body, mind and heart? 

Does He cry out, "Do this more!  Be still more!  Be still, my sweet, precious child!"  I think He does.  But He gets muffled out by the busyness of life.  I think in this quiet moment with my little child, I was still long enough to hear Him.

I sometimes find it hard to be still as a mom of growing little boys.  To see, really see as I should, and cherish this very short and wonderful season of life.  To give undistracted attention to all the details that I want to remember and cherish always.

In much the same way, I sometimes find it hard to be still as a child of the Loving Father.  To see, really see as I should, Him and His goodness.  To give Him the undistracted attention, adoration and praise He deserves always.

The fact is: Hard or not, both are worth my time.

Can you hear Him saying, "Be still, my child!"  Why not make the time to sit with your beloved Father today?

 

"Be still and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth"

Psalm 46:10

 

"We are merely moving shadows, and all our busy rushing ends in nothing."

Psalm 39:6

 

Another post you might enjoy: Be Still

 

My busy boy then and now:

So thankful for his him, his love and how God uses him to teach me!

A note he wrote to me this week.  :)

Oh, to cherish this time!

Helping Everyone "Out There"

I listened to her talk.  Telling me all about this big thing she had been working on.  All in the name of Christ, of course. 

She had spent time, quite a bit of it. 
She had spent money, quite a bit of it. 
She had exerted effort, quite a bit of it.
She used her God given talents and interests, quite a bit of them.

She was reaching out to the needy ones "out there".  People she didn't know.  But God knows.

I listened.  I wondered.  Nothing wrong with any of it.  But still I wondered, why? 

Not that she shouldn't, because somebody should.  But why all this time, money, effort and talent for this?  For them, the unknown?  What was the appeal?  Why not help those right here in front of her?  Honestly, I thought of my own need that day and wondered why she didn't notice.

Before I could examine her any further I knew I had to stop to look in the mirror first.  Take a look inward instead of judging outward.  Why do I do what I do?  I'm afraid I'm as guilty as anyone.

Ah, I spend so much time helping everyone "out there".  Three blogs.  Four Facebook pages.  Big women's events.  A few ministries that I participate in and/or support.

Not that I shouldn't, because somebody should.  But why all this time, money, effort and talent for these things? 

First, am I so busy helping everyone "out there", that I'm missing those right here? 

Because ministry doesn't just happen at a big event or soup kitchen or missionary post in Timbuktu.  Sure, it happens there, but just as much it happens in our own homes, communities, jobs and churches. How am I living out the message I say I believe?  Ministry happens on Facebook and blogs, sure.  But what about at the grocery store?  What about in my own home?  Quite honestly, it's easier, most of the time, to help everyone "out there". 

Then, I asked myself, "What's my motivation?"  Because the motivation of my heart is even more important than what I actually do! 

Donating money, running ministries and writing on Christian blogs sounds more glamourous than scrubbing floors and washing clothes.  But I don't think what the world sees as important is necessarily what God sees as important.  In fact, I don't think the things that impress the world impress Him at all.  Yet, do I seek their honor above His?

^"But among you it will be different. Whoever wants to be a leader among you must be your servant, and whoever wants to be first among you must become your slave. For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve others and to give his life as a ransom for many.”

Matthew 20:26-28

It's good to check my heart.  Do I do these seemingly big things to look impressive and receive human glory?  Do I serve in the trenches when no one is looking, besides the One who matters, with humility and love as my Savior, Jesus, did?  Because scrubbing floors and washing clothes with the right heart attitude are pleasing to the One who made me and saved me.  They are service in His name just the same, if not more.

How many times in my attempt to help everyone "out there", have I missed the opportunity right here.  That sick friend who needed a meal.  The little son who needed some cuddle time.  The elderly neighbor who could use a call or visit.  A husband who needed his wife.  The department store clerk who needs an encouraging word.  I miss it too often.

It starts in the heart.

What should I be doing right here...with no other motivation but the love of Jesus that dwells in me? 

What should you be doing?  It's a question worth asking.

Note: God has ministry for us right here and out there. Both big and (seemingly) small. What a shame to miss any part of these divine opportunities.  Whatever He's leading me and you to do, may we do it with no other motivation but love.

 

"Take care! Don't do your good deeds publicly, to be admired, because then you will lose the reward from your Father in heaven. When you give a gift to someone in need, don't shout about it as the hypocrites do -- blowing trumpets in the synagogues and streets to call attention to their acts of charity! I assure you, they have received all the reward they will ever get. But when you give to someone, don't tell your left hand what your right hand is doing. Give your gifts in secret, and your Father, who knows all secrets, will reward you." Matthew 6:1-4

It begins here.  In the every day.  I serve.  But do I serve in love? 

What is my attitude when no one is looking, but Him?

The ones right here before my eyes (and their daddy) are my first ministry.

It starts in the heart.  Oh, not to forget!

 

Who has God put in your realm of influence?

 

Moms out there, check out this post I recently read about Christlike Mothering. Good!!

Relate?  Leave a comment.  I love hearing from friends...both right here and out there! :)
   

Wasting Time

If there’s one thing I hear every day, many times throughout the day, it’s, “Mom, watch this!”  Sometimes it’s, “Mom, look at this.”  Either way, it’s often and coming from both boys.  The two year old follows after the five year old, watching his every move and seeking to imitate it.  He even calls me “Mom” (rather than “Mommy”) just like big brother.  They are busy, rarely sit still, and they want me to take notice, “Watch this.”  Sometimes they mess up that cartwheel, perfect move or rock throw.  That calls for a “do over”.  I watch again.

(My boys throwing rocks in the creek)

There are days when I almost get tired of hearing, “Watch this” yet one more time.  But I remember how fleeting these days are, these days that these two precious little boys are most often under my feet,  wanting my every attention and seeking after only my approval and admiration.  They are growing quickly.  In a blink they will be out of the house, spending time with others that interest them more than dear ol’ mom and entertaining a much larger audience.  This season, my time with them as little boys, is slipping by.  So I watch and admire and say, “Wow, good job!”  I’m not wasting time, I’m building relationships with them, relationships that I pray will last well into their adulthood.  And I am teaching them along the way.  It matters.

God’s been teaching me some things lately (when is He not?!) too...about time.

 I detest wasting time, yet I do it more often than I care to admit.  It’s so easy to spend time.  Once it’s spent, there’s no getting it back.  I have one life.  There are no “do overs”.  I need to be intentional.  I need to spend my time wisely, doing the things He’s called me to do. 

“…lead a life worthy of your calling, for you have been called by God.”  Ephesians 4:1

I make excuses.  I look at life circumstances.  I get caught up in the daily things of life and lose sight of heaven.  I waste the time God has given me.

Sure there is a time and place for relaxation and leisure.  But more often I want to be busy, kind of like my boys, full of energy and zest, rarely sitting still.  Not for busyness sake, nor for the world’s admiration.  I think sometimes in our culture people seek to be busy in order to appear fulfilled and in an attempt to prove their life matters.  I don’t want to be busy just to be busy.   I simply want to  live intentionally, doing the work He’s called me to.  I want to say, “Watch this, Lord” as I seek to obey Him, desiring to please and honor Him with my life.  I want to look ahead to eternity and the rewards awaiting there.  Not striving in my own power, but living in His. 

When I do sit, I want it to be in His presence, building relationship with Him.  Not only for our relationship sake, although that is important, but also so I can teach my sons how to do the same.  They follow in my footsteps, even more closely than my two year old follows big brother’s.  And I’m finding that my sphere of influence is even greater than I originally thought, reaching far beyond the confines of my home walls.  The world is watching…my friends, neighbors, loved ones, even acquaintances.   I want them to see Him in me.  I want to follow His every move, to imitate Him as I build relationships with others.  The only way I can do this is by getting to know Him intimately, being still before Him in prayer and Bible study.  It takes time.  But that is never wasted time.

I want to listen as He says, “Look at this” when I’m in His Word.  Or “Watch this” as He clearly displays His glory in my very ordinary day and life.  Then, I can give Him adequate thanks and praise. 

My time here is so short, fleeting.  It won’t be long before this season has passed.  I don’t want to just spend time, I want to cease every opportunity!  And I believe God takes notice of it. It matters.

Maybe this post is only for me, but I wonder if there are others out there who feel convicted about wasting their God given time.  How about you?  Are you living a life worthy of your calling, living intentionally?  Maybe it’s time to make some changes.  Maybe you need to let go of some excuses.  Maybe you need to take some time today to seek after Him and His best for you.  I will do the same.  Because that is never a waste of time!  

“…Stay away from believers who live idle lives…”  II Thessalonians 3:6

A short story: Next Saturday I will be at ReNEWed Life Women’s Event.  Just a few months ago, this event didn’t exist and, as far as I know, nothing like it has ever taken place in our small community.  My friend, Jill, and I had helped organize a big women’s retreat in a larger town an hour and a half from home for a few years.  Although it was such a blessing, at different times, each of us had felt God leading us to step off that leadership team.   One day afterwards, we discussed a prompting in our hearts to “do something” for the women right here in our rural community.   Normally, women around here would have to drive 1½ to 3 hours to attend a women’s conference.   As we prayed about it, the Lord clearly opened doors for National Speaker and Author Lisa Whittle to come to our rural area, small town Cresco, Iowa. 

I’m leaving out many details and many displays of God’s faithfulness.  But the reason I am sharing this, is to share this point: no matter who you are or where you are, God can use you if you are obedient and willing to do the work.  Do not waste time making excuses or looking at life circumstances, your lack of ability, resources or talent.  He will do things beyond your wildest imagination if you seek after His will and trust Him.  I can hardly wait to watch Him display His glory (again) next Saturday at this women’s event that two farmer’s wives and others in rural Iowa envisioned at His prompting!  And we will give Him all the praise and glory!

Self-Control

Our topic at MOPS this month was “self-control”. Probably not the most popular topic. I mean, who really wants to talk about denying self, right? And, yet, I think it’s an important subject. If you are anything like me, you have probably felt more “out of control” than “self-controlled” in one area or another at some point in time…maybe even right now.

Does self-control seem out of reach? Impossible? Unrealistic?

I have felt like that at times and, in some areas of my life, I feel like that now. Yet, God’s Word says to think clearly and exercise self-control (see I Peter 1:13). Do you think He would have instructed us to exercise self-control if it were impossible to do so? Remember what you feel and what is true are often two different things.

I’m definitely not an expert when it comes to self-control. I still struggle in areas. But, I have learned a few things on the subject in my lifetime that I would like to share with my Christian friends, and remind myself of, at the same time.

1. It is not impossible!  You can change! How do I know? I use to bite my fingernails down to the wick. I quit. I was in a destructive relationship and living a destructive lifestyle. I was able to change. I use to recklessly spend money. I got out of debt and am now very frugal. If I can do it, you can too! Nothing is impossible with God! (Luke 1:37)

2. You can not do it alone (but you can do it)! It takes reliance on the Holy Spirit. You can try all the positive thinking techniques and “fast and easy” schemes out there. They might even work for a time. But, most likely, you’ll fall back into old habits. Truly practicing self-control requires a dependence on what I call “Spirit-control”.  Knowing we can not do it within our own strength, but we can do all things through Christ who gives us strength (Philippians 4:13). I’ve heard people say, “God never gives us more than we can handle.” I believe God gives us more than we can handle all the time, but He never gives us more than He can help us handle! You are able because He is able!

“But the Holy Spirit produces...self-control…Those who belong to Christ Jesus have nailed the passions and desires of their sinful nature to his cross and crucified them there. Since we are living by the Spirit, let us follow the Spirit’s leading in every part of our lives.” Galatians 5:22-25

3. You aren’t going to “just change”!  It takes a lot of Thinking and Praying to see lasting results! It requires a change of mindset. We have to think about what we are doing rather than merely going through the motions of everyday life. It takes active effort and thought. Even more so, it requires persistent prayer. We have to ask God for strength, will-power and to help us think clearly. We have to speak to Him often, asking for His help, throughout the day. We must recognize our moment by moment dependence on Him. Perhaps that is why His Word tells us to pray without ceasing (I Thessalonians 5:17).

4. The enemy will try to discourage you!  Don’t let him. You’re probably going to mess up at some point. A mess up doesn’t equal failure. Instead of beating yourself up, repent, move on and do better next time. He will tell you that you “can’t” and that you “won’t” and that your not able. He is a liar! He wants you to give up. Stand on the truth of God’s faithful Word rather than the whispers of a lying thief whose goal is to destroy you (I Peter 5:8). He wants to keep you in a place of defeat. If you are a believer, remember greater is He (the Holy Spirit) that is in you, than he that is in the world (the enemy)! (I John 4:4)

Self-control truly is not out of reach. We don’t have to live feeling like areas of our life are “out of our control”. God gave His Holy Spirit to those of us who believe for direction and power. Wherever you are struggling, know He knows and cares and will help you if you seek Him.

Let’s review! We must remember, it is NOT impossible. We can not do it alone, but we CAN do it! It takes thinking and praying. And although the enemy will try to discourage us, God’s Word is full of encouragement!

"So do not fear, for I am with you; be not dismayed because I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." Isaiah 41:10

What I Can't Do...

I was feeling a bit sorry for myself. It’s embarrassing to write, but it is true. Poor me. Why me?

We think, Noah, our youngest has a wheat intolerance. And I believe I do too, except I have often chosen to ignore it. I know I feel better when I cut wheat (and dairy) out of my diet. But, do you know how hard it is to eliminate wheat in our modern day American culture? Do you know that (at least it seem like) wheat is in almost every processed food available to us? That means none of our regular store bought breads, pastas, granola bars, pizzas, cookies, cereals, etc. Not only that, many of our condiments contain wheat and so do Campbell’s creamed soups…and the list goes on and on.

I enjoy cooking, but I’ve never learned to cook completely from scratch. No, I’ve always used those shortcuts that are so typical in most American kitchens. Do you know how much more time consuming it is cooking completely from scratch? This means relearning how to make almost everything.

Then, the thought hit me, “We will never be able to go out to eat again!” No more Pizza Hut or McDonald’s…not that either are healthy or even my favorite. Yet, they are convenient and to think that we can never eat at those restaurants again…ugh! How will we ever travel to Indiana to visit my family without a routine stop at McDonald’s?!

One day my mind was fixated on all the things we can’t eat and how I was going to readjust our “normal”. That night I read our oldest his nightly devotional. It retold the story of Eve in the garden. Hopefully, you’re familiar with this true tale. God told Adam and Eve they could eat from any of the trees in the perfect Garden of Eden except for one. The serpent tempted them. They ate from the forbidden tree.

In Andrew’s devotional it pointed out that there were many different kinds of trees in the garden. God told them they could eat from all those trees except for one. And yet, when they were tempted, they chose to eat the forbidden fruit. This was the beginning of the fall of man.

This spoke to my heart on so many different levels.

First, this was a reminder that God has provided many other food options for us. There are many other grains besides wheat. In addition, we have a deep freeze full of Angus Beef (best steaks, burger, roasts, even brats and wieners you ever tasted!). We have whole chickens, sweet corn, green beans, salsa, strawberries and jam in the freezer. We have our own canned applesauce, jelly and juice. We have chickens that lay fresh eggs for us every day. Not only that, there are tons of wheat free options at our local grocery store (there are more and more gluten free/wheat free options available these days than ever before), plus various meats, fruits and veggies.  No more McDonald's...so what?  I get healthy, nurishing food!

In reality, I just need to change my way of thinking…and do what is best and healthiest for my family.

Then, it hit me. This is like so many other things in my life. Sometimes my focus gets stuck on what I can’t have or what I don’t have, rather than on everything else God has provided for me.

I am so blessed! Yet, sometimes I focus on the stains on my living room carpet more than the little blessings from God who made them. Sometimes I focus on all the things that are “wrong” with the house, rather than all the things that are “right”. Sometimes I wonder why I can’t do this thing or that thing today, rather than “one of these days”, and I forget all that I do get to do today!

In November, I stepped down from my role on the Rise & Shine Women’s Retreat leadership team. It was a tough decision because I love that ministry. It is especially dear to my heart because I was one of original team members who helped start the conference. I enjoyed my role on the team, and found my God-given gifts were well put to use. And still, I felt God tugging at my heart to step back and focus more on my number one ministry, one He also called me to…home.

It seems like it should be easy to make a decision to simply “stay home” with the ones I love the most. It wasn’t…and still isn’t. Of course, it doesn’t makes sense to continue doing something, something I was doing for Him in the first place, when He has clearly showed me that it is time to step back. And still, at times, I feel a grief rise up in me over the loss of this role. I wonder why I can’t continue on (even though, in reality, the answer is right before me). I know He has called me into women’s ministry, so it doesn’t completely make sense. Yes, I’m still coordinating our local MOPS group, and I enjoy that. But, why would God want to “take this away from me”?

Then, I am reminded of all that He has given! I get to be a wife and a mom! I looooove being a wife and mom! I love my family! Even in a culture that generally devalues these roles, He does not!! He has chosen me for these role. What an honor! In this season of life, home is where I need to be most. My husband and sons are gifts from Him, whom I get to nurture. He isn’t taking anything away, He’s giving me an opportunity!! Although sometimes I feel so inadequate, He equips me for these daily roles, and is building my character for future ones.

Not only that, it’s amazing that I ever got to be on the Rise & Shine leadership team in the first place! What a wonderful experience! I learned so much about Him, myself and ministry. I will cherish the memories, remember the lessons and apply much of what I learned throughout the rest of my life…even now as I get to help encourage other moms at MOPS.

Furthermore, I see all He has provided. Not only has He provided a way to eternal life for me through Jesus Christ, He provides all I need for each day. I reflect on the destructive road I was once headed down, how He provided a way out, and gave me this life, one better than I had ever dared to dream of. I’m not perfect, I still fail Him and yet, He forgives me again (and again). He continues to love me.

Another thought: sometimes people get so fixated on what they can’t do as a Christian (or if they became one) that they loose sight of what God provides for those who love, honor and obey Him. They don’t want to give up what they want, but forget about the peace, hope and joy it will bring if they surrender their will to Him.

In reality, I don’t want my way, I want God’s best…in all areas of my life!

No more feeling sorry for myself. I must change my focus from what I can’t do and what I don’t have to all He has provided! I am grateful!!

Could you use a change of focus too?

…be content with what you have, because God has said,

 "Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you." Hebrews 13:5

Oh, to Love Him More!

My husband ended up in the ER the night before last. Just a few hours after I said something I shouldn't have.

I spoke to a loved one earlier in the day. Someone who shared health concerns. I was reminded that life does not go on forever, that bodies fail and all people die. Even the strongest of us.

As I thought about and prayed for this person, emotion ovewehelmed me. I spent the evening thinking about all the things I take for granted. Of this fleeting life. Of regrets and goals to do better. I thought of the people I love and the way I wanted to show them more...much more.

In all the feelings I failed to see what was right before me.  To recognize the seriousness of my husband's pain. The pain of the man I say I love more than life. The pain he had told me he was experiencing. The pain I thought would go away. He seems so invincible. He's so healthy and strong. Rarely complains.

In the uproar of my feelings, concerns and contemplation of life, a remark my husband made, made me angry. I lashed out with hurtful words. Even as I said it, I knew it was wrong. Emotions getting the best of me. Still I spewed them. The tongue is like a blazing fire. Oh, to control it!

All that time thinking about what really matters...and the one who matters right before me, get's overlooked. He got the worst of me.

As I sat in the emergency room with my dear husband, I had more time to think. 1am...2am...3am...4am. It was 8am before he made it to surgery. An emergency laparoscopic appendectomy. I did not sleep all night, but that didn't matter. What mattered was he was getting the help he needed. I apologized for my words. He forgave me. I love yous were exchanged...and we meant it.

On Wednesday afternoon I thought all was well. Although these health issues have been brewing where I can not see, and where I do not know, in my world all seemed well. How quickly life can change. Oh, to remember! To live each moment as if this is my last chance.

My pastor reminded us on Christmas Eve that this life is about relationships, relationship first with God and then with others. And so I vowed that this year, this new year 2012, I will focus more wholey on something that has already been important to me, relationships. To live more as Christ, less selfishly and more lovingly. To love God with all my heart, mind and soul and to extend that love to others. If I love Him as I should, I will love others as I should.

Only days into this goal and I blow it. Letting hurtful words slip my lips, in one of the most important relationships in my life. Then, my husband gets sick and I kick myself.

BUT HIS mercies are new every morning! And really every moment. I start again, reaching for the goal. Living in this moment. Wishing to see, really see.

My heart echoes the words of Ann Voskamp "O Lord, open the eyes of my heart, the eyes of my hands, the eyes of my mouth, the eyes of my feet. I long to live all eye."

I asked my husband for forgiveness. He very graciously forgave me, saying that he understood. He loves me. I asked God for His forgiveness. He forgives and gives me new mercies. He loves me too. And I am so thankful! I decide to forgive myself...not looking back, but living in this moment and looking ahead to what He has for me to do next. Reaching towards the goal.

I hope to take my husband home from the hospital today. As he recovers from his surgery, I thank God that it wasn't much worse. I thank God for another chance.

Henry Blackaby wrote, "Jesus does not need your resolutions, your recommitments, or your promises to try harder this year. If your resolve to obey God last year (or last week) did not help you to be faithful, it will not make you successful this year. Jesus asks for your love. If you truly love Him, your service for Him in the new year will be of the quality that He desires."

Oh, to love Him more! Which will lead to loving others better...and speaking words that are filled with His grace, rather than fleshly poison. Help me, dear Jesus!

Because of the LORD’s great love we are not consumed,

for his compassions never fail.

They are new every morning;

great is your faithfulness.

Lamentations 3:22-23

May the words of my mouth and the meditation

of my heart be pleasing in your sight,

O LORD, my Rock and my Redeemer.

Psalm 19:14

copyright Rachel Beran

Find Your Purpose

When I was a young girl I believed God had a plan for my life…and that it would be something grand. That I would grow up, graduate from high school and that I would venture out to fulfill my calling. I didn’t know what it would be, but I knew it would be something BIG.

My mama told me that I was a promise. Teachers told me I had potential. I believed there was a great purpose for my life. Oh, the glorious possibilities!

Do you remember that little song, “I am a Promise” ? I sang my little heart out to that song. “I am a promise. I am a possibility. I am a promise with a capital P. I am a great big bundle of potentiality…”

High school graduation came. High school graduation went. Still I didn’t have a clue what “destiny” I should be seeking after. I had no plan. I had little confidence. And eventually the idea of being such a wonderful promise began to fade. I realized I was just like everyone else.

The thing is: God did (and does) have a plan for my life. The truth also is: He has a plan for all of us. Often times we spend so much time thinking that we have to find out calling; thinking that we need to do something big and important that we miss one simple truth.

Glorifying God is our soul purpose! That’s why He created us! Once this truth penetrated my heart, everything changed for me!! 

No matter what we do, where we are or how we get there, our purpose is to bring Him honor and glory! It doesn’t matter if you’re a school teacher, a stay at home mama, foreign missionary or a rocket scientist, as long as you do everything you do in His name.

Strangely, when we ask ourselves the question, “What is my purpose in life?” Hearing the answer “to glorify God” doesn’t really seem to satisfy us. We want more of a concrete plan laid out before us. We want to do something, to be something, to go somewhere NOW. We want to make a difference and we don't want to wait.

Not that it’s bad for us Christian to want to do something for Christ. As Christians we should have a desire to share Him with others. But, glorifying God isn’t just done in some big arena. We can glorify God in the everyday moments of life, no matter who we are or what we do for a living or what ministry we’re a part of.

God isn’t nearly as concerned with what we do as He is with who we are!

“I am the vine, you are the branches.

He who abides in Me, and I in him,

bears much fruit; for apart from Me

you can do nothing.”

John 15:5

I recently read some thoughts Henry Blackaby shared about the above verse, “In our zeal to produce ‘results’ for our Lord, we sometimes become so intent on fruit production that we neglect abiding in Christ. We may feel that ‘abiding’ is not productive or that it takes too much time away form our fruit production. Yet Jesus said that it is not our activity that produces fruit, it is our relationship with Him…If you will remain steadfastly in fellowship with Jesus, a great harvest will be the natural by-product.”

How do we glorify God? We must abide in Him. By getting to know Him personally. By loving Him (and others). By serving Him. By praising Him. By trusting Him. By seeking to honor Him with our every thought, word and action. EVERY day! In the ordinary moments of life. If we do this, the results will be great! If we don’t, our lives won’t amount to a hill of beans, even if we’re the most famous person alive. Apart from Him we are nothing!

God might send you somewhere grand, to do things that you think are way over your head, to fulfill a purpose that matches your wildest dreams. But, it all begins with abiding in Him...at this moment, every moment, of everyday. Don't underestimate the influence you can have right where you are today! Start there and the rest will fall into place. Be patient and ask God to open doors for you to share your talents. But remember, “fruit” doesn’t grow overnight! It is a process that takes time…and a lot of abiding! 

Are you searching for your purpose? Or have you lost sight of your purpose?  Start fulfilling your purpose today by seeking to glorify Him with you life. Wherever you go, whatever you do, whomever you speak to, be Jesus in the flesh. Live a life to bless God and others. It may not seem like a huge thing, but I believe the things we consider to be small things often add up to be the big things in the end. Just think of the possibilities!! No one else has your sphere of influence!  

“If you are walking daily with the Lord, you will not have to

find God’s will - you will already be in it.”

Henry Blackaby

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Note: I am a stay at home wife and mama. Who better to influence the 3 lives in my home than me? I go to a MOPS group with about 10 other women. I can bless other women there. I have 4 little girls in my kindergarten Sunday school class. Seeds are being planted in their young hearts that I believe will grow to fruition.

I also serve on the leadership team that plans Rise & Shine Women’s Retreat each fall. Last year there were 350 women in attendance. It is such a blessing to be part of this big event! It’s an honor to pray for these dear women, to be part of something that encourages so many on their walk of faith. Yet, even equally fulfilling to me is making personal connections with a handful of them. I love being able to pray with them and to have opportunities to speak truth into their hearts long after the conference is over. Ministry is there too...one on one.  It's so personal, just like God is so personal!

My point: it’s not about the numbers, it’s about planting seeds; seeds that produce lasting fruit. Glorifying Christ is never a small thing!

I like this quote from Jill Briscoe: “People often ask me, ‘What do you do on all your travels to faraway places?’ I answer, ‘I just try to make sure I am available to God and to the people on a moment-by-moment basis.’ That applies to what I do at home as well. In every part of my life, my job is to be ready to obey, ready to pour out.”

Christmas…traditions, memories and focus

I haven’t blogged in a while. Sorry, I haven’t meant to be scarce, but the month of December brings a different focus for me.

December is busy…but in a good way. Busy with the fun stuff that memories are made of. Things like decorating a gingerbread house, stringing popcorn garland, making cutout cookies and wrapping gifts. Andrew and I have been having a lot of fun!

The snow in Iowa puts a twist on things and often makes travel from day to day a bit iffy (thank goodness for online shopping).

In the snow and ice we must make time for sledding (well they sled, I get out the camera and camcorder)! Oh, the joy of living on a gravel road!

Just trying to keep our 8 month old, Noah, away from the tree is a full time job! :) He’s crawling everywhere and pulling himself up to standing these days. He's growing and learning...and is very busy! 

So far his favorite thing about Christmas is the wrapping paper! :) 

I've been very reminiscent the last several days. I think Christmas tends to bring that out in me. I got to thinking about traditions. I don't remember many. I think my mom’s “tradition” was to do something different every year. We did a lot of fun things, usually involving making something, but we didn’t usually do it more than once. She always tried to think of something new and different and fun to do. Which I've realized was a fun tradition!  :)

As I've reminisced about Christmas’ past, I thought of all kinds of good memories…from yearly stockings full to the brim with all the little stuff that I loved (that was my favorite part)...to finding my Christmas presents in my mom’s closet one year and being MORE excited on Christmas Eve than ever because I couldn’t wait to play with that walking, barking dog (that was GREAT technology in the 80s, you know?!) that I had found...to playing “bingo” with my family (siblings, nieces, nephews, etc) every year. I loved being with my family! My mom made every Christmas magical and fun and special! So the one “tradition” I cherish the most is the LOVE that I felt…every year!

One of the greatest memories had to do more with giving gifts than it did receiving them. A very kind woman named, Margie, offered to take me Christmas shopping for my mom. She took me to town, gave me a budget and told me I could pick whatever I wanted for my mom. I loved it! I loved it sooo much! She marveled at how far I could make the dollars stretch.

When I was done picking my treasures, we would head back to her house to wrap the presents. I loved that too! Margie was patient and kind. Her husband, Jim (my mom’s first cousin), was sitting in the recliner when we arrived. I thought he was so nice and I loved his teasing and attention. Wrapping gifts was fun.

I felt like my little heart would burst I was so happy! Just thinking about my mom opening these gifts on Christmas morning simply thrilled me! Then, as if that wasn’t enough, Margie appeared with a gift…for me! I didn’t expect it. I was thoroughly surprised…and sooo happy! It was a Cabbage Patch doll…a real one, not a knockoff, a real one! :) Valerie Imogene, that was her name. She had pretty red hair and I loved her. And I could hardly wait for Christmas Day so my mom could open the gifts I knew she was going to love too.

Margie took me shopping like that for 3 years (if I remember right). My mom still has some of the gifts I picked for her…and I still have all 3 gifts that Margie gave to me. What great memories! And it’s all because someone chose to go out of their way to be loving and kind!! Jim and Margie didn’t have to do that, but they chose to…and that little girl, now a mommy herself, will never forget the LOVE!

Andrew and I have enjoyed a lot of fun Christmas activities together this year (and Noah will join us when he gets old enough). It will be interesting to see what traditions “stick” and which do not. What memories they will have and which ones they will forget. But, above all else I hope they remember the LOVE that surrounded them.

This year, I can hardly wait for our little boys to open their gifts because I know they’re eyes are going to light up. I’m thankful for the time with family and friends. I'm thankful for the time I had with my family in Indiana earlier this month and that we get to spend time with my husband's family later this month.  I pray these very important people will feel the LOVE that I have for them and HIS love shining through me! And that I can find ways to reach out to others like Margie did to me...without expecting anything in return.

So, I guess in short, this holiday season I am trying to spend time focusing on what is most important…LOVE. Although I often fall short and have to start all over again the next day, I’m focusing on my friends and family, my little ones and the little One who was born to die for my sins (and yours). He is the reason for it all! So thankful for the LOVE He showed...and continues to show to us each and every day!

No matter where you are in life...you can choose to do the same!

Make your own attitude that of Christ Jesus, who, existing in the form of God, did not consider equality with God as something to be used for His own advantage. Instead He emptied Himself by assuming the form of a slave, taking on the likeness of men. And when He had come as a man in His external form, He humbled Himself by becoming obedient to the point of death-even death on a cross. Philippians 2:5-8

Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends. John 15:13

NO GREATER LOVE!!

What is your favorite memory? Your favorite tradition?

Where is your focus this Christmas? I’d enjoy hearing about it!

MERRY CHRISTMAS, friends!

Second Chances

I’ve heard it said, “God is a God of second chances.” I agree with that, but at the same time I don’t. I’m a person who has had second chances, third chances and chances upon chances, so I know all about God’s abundant grace. Still, there are times when we don’t get a second chance.

That encounter with that person today may be your last or only chance to share Christ’s love with them.

Someone you love may leave this world, making this your last chance to say, “I love you”, “I’m sorry” or “I forgive you.”

If you speak words in anger (or just carelessly) you could really hurt someone, you can’t take them back and no matter how sorry you are the scars still exist.

If you’re not obedient to follow God’s lead, that door of opportunity may not open again.

If you make bad decisions you will experience the consequences.

If you break the law you will have to pay the price. Note: have you ever heard national author and speaker, Carol Kent’s story? Her son boldly shot and killed another man in a moment of rage. He is serving a life sentence in prison. Not only can he not take back that day, the other man doesn’t get a second chance either.

If you die you will not have another chance to make it right and you will also have to stand before God and answer for the decisions you made. (Rom 14:10)

Sometime, someday it WILL be your last chance!

That’s why God’s Word says, “Today is the day of salvation.” (II Cor 6:2)

That’s why we must “make the most of every opportunity.” (Col 4:5)

That’s why we must share Christ’s love with the world, being His ambassador. (II Cor 5:20) Really loving them. (Rom 12:9-10)

We may get another chance, we may not. God is not required to give us another chance. It is only by his grace that we get one. We should be grateful for every moment God gives us and not waste it! (I Tim 1:4) Each day is a gift from Him.

We don’t know when it will be our last chance. Whether we die tomorrow or years from now, we will never get THIS DAY back again. This is our one chance to live this one day!

What will you do with your chance today?

Thank God for His grace and forgiveness. Commit this day...and your life to Him.  Thank Him for your second (or third or fourth or whatever) chance today. Then live THIS DAY to the fullest, seeking ways to honor Him…and I will choose to do the same!  Let's not waste this day of opportunity!!