Who I Was, Who I Am

It's been a long time since I had written a poem...years. However, yesterday as I made the long drive from my home to my favorite chiropractor's office, I began to think about the grace the Lord has showered upon me.  I thought about the sin of my past, where I was...where I was headed and I became overwhelmed with thanksgiving.  I found myself praising God and thanking Him for His redemption.  Before I knew it, words to a poem started flowing.  I scrambled to find a pen and piece of paper in the vehicle console.  I found them and began to scribble the words on tiny corners of this already written on sheet of paper.  Note: this was very safe as I drove along the highway (probably worse than text messaging while driving!).  :)  The words were barely legible, but they were there...for me to decode when I got home. :) 

I haven't been a very consistent blogger for some time now...so many things to write about just haven't taken the time to post them.  I will get back in "the swing of things" some day.  For today, I wanted to share my poem with  you.

Who I Was, Who I Am

My heart aches as I think of who I once was,
The empty, dreadful person I have been,
Doing as I pleased - wretched, wandering.
My life was boldly full of self and sin.

I was entangled by my own selfishness,
Ignorantly thinking I was independent and free,
So overcome by the world’s fleeting joy,
A noose around my neck, yet I could not see.

Sorrow fills my being as I think of where I was,
Yet, joy and gratefulness fill me more as I pray.
Consumed by forgiveness as I go to my Father,
His grace frees me to close the past, focus on today.

Praise God! His amazing grace falls fresh on me,
My sins are washed away and long gone.
I have put on His cloak of righteousness,
Filled with His Spirit, power and a new song.

No condemnation, no fear or doubt,
No use to hold onto who I was then,
I am forgiven, set truly free for eternity,
Dread replaced by praise; self replaced by Him.

Not living by my own weak, limited ability,
Rather, depending on His strength that fills,
Knowing nothing is impossible for those who believe.
My future is bright as He shines the light that heals.

I am not who I was because I have the “I AM,”
No longer have to live in shame and sin,
He loves me just as I am, yet helps me to change,
Growing, changing, knowing who I am in Him.

Written by Rachel Beran  8-23-10
(Please do not use without permission from Rachel Beran)

Do you know His Amazing Grace?  What does it mean to you?  If you do, thank Him today!  If you do not, what are you waiting for?  It's a free gift and you'll never regret reaching out to take it!  If you would like someone to pray for/with you, I am always available.  E-mail me rachel.beran@yahoo.com